We had a little bit of light

You're gonna hear me talk about Zimbabwe quite often. It's a place that God revealed things to me that I am now responsible to share. My team and I went into the Marigumura village to help repair a school, love people, and share the gospel.

I found myself today getting frustrated with things at my job and the execution of a service. Specifically, I was pissed at my guitar not working for a part of the service. My worry-some self tells me if my guitar doesn't work, I can't lead. If I cant lead, no one will follow the songs. If we don't sing then Jesus won't show up, if Jesus isn't here, not as many hands are raised. If not as many hands are raised, then I suck at my job.

I realized it all kinda boiled down to me, myself, and Jeremiah. What isn't the main focus went from peripheral to dead center. It became all about the success of a service and the lights going on when they are supposed to. It became about smooth transitions between songs. It became about how many hands were raised, how well I sang, and what people thought about it.

Looking over some pictures today I found a picture of me in Zimbabwe at the village speaking to the African men, women, and children about the book of Daniel. My interpreter Lamick was by my side, my team with kids on their laps were sitting on the ground and benches, the Marigumura choir was behind me, and Jesus was all around us. All we had was a little bit of light, and God moved mountains. We prayed for fathers struggling to take care of their families, for mothers sick with AIDs, and for children that want to know more about Jesus. ALL WE HAD WAS A LITTLE BIT OF LIGHT. We didn't need guitars, sound systems, smooth transitions, offering baskets, communion trays, announcement slides, bulletins, volunteer sign-up booths, or even a coffee shop. Jesus doesn't need these things or even me for that matter in order for Him to show up. Not that these things are bad at all. As i referenced in my last post, things like this are great tools to be used in the church for His glory, but they are NEVER to be held in higher need than the gospel.

I came to realize more importantly that I'm not that important. I'm not fishing for attention here, I mean what I say. I looked at church and said, "Today will only be successful at church if I am awesome and everything goes right to the service that I created". Thats a lot of pride to carry. that's also a lot reliance on effort. Romans 9 is when Paul talks about not relying on our efforts because they will amount to nothing, so we must count on God's grace and mercy. boy do I suck at that. Those 2 things were exactly what I lost sight of. They are things I have to force focus my eyes to see on a daily basis through all the visual noise and chaos of what I have made church to be.

I felt so much shame today seeing this picture. I have once again made church into exactly what it isn't. I have made worship into a small calculated box for God to maneuver in. anyone else done the same? along with shame though, I was quick to be joyful for the Lord reminding me what to rejoice in. I was overwhelmed with peace and God spoke. Not audibly but a still small voice I can somehow sense. A voice telling me to not forget what I showed you in Africa and what I showed you to rejoice in. To rejoice in the lost sheep coming home, to rejoice in the presence of the holy spirit regardless of where you are. To rejoice in being broken with family and friends in the middle of the plains of Africa with the word of the gospel, and only a little bit of light....